Cruise Passenger > Reviews > Review: Radiance of the Seas

Review: Radiance of the Seas

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8 May 2011

Why is the start of a relaxing cruise invariably so stressful? Or perhaps it’s just me. I’m joining Royal Caribbean’s Radiance of the Seas in Tampa for one of RCI’s last transits through the Panama Canal for quite a while. Staying in Orlando, it’s only a maximum of a couple of hours drive down the interstate, drop my rental car at the airport, a cab ride to the ship and I’ll be in my own shipboard poolside Margueritaville with hours to spare.

Except I’m only halfway to Tampa and I’m looking at the backside of a long traffic jam on the freeway. Suddenly all that spare time is evaporating and I recall tales of passengers turned away because they didn’t arrive in what US authorities regarded as sufficient time to clear customs and immigration formalities. I dive off I-4 to the confusion of my Budget GPS and after half an hour return to the freeway beyond the bottleneck. In one of those gratifying sequences that gladden the traveller’s heart the car drop off is quick, the cab line is short, the driver is friendly and knows where to take me and he deposits me at Cruise Terminal 3 with time to spare.

Now I enter Royal Caribbean world. A porter hardly sneers at my antipodean lack of printed baggage tags (not an option for my online check-in), we handwrite some and my bags disappear as fast as the tip. Upstairs there’s a security check as thorough as any airport and I sign that I’ve never seen a swine with flu, a mad cow, or any of the other afflictions of humans in herds. My Australian passport has me sent to a special check in counter but I pass whatever alien checks and get my plastic swipe card/room key.

As I go from one queue to the next I ponder how unequal systems can be in the egalitarian USA. With no gold pass or Concierge Club membership but merely a reservation for an inside cabin for one I can only look across at the expansive and expedited Express Check In and Express Boarding areas. But soon enough I’m on board and directed to cabin 3143.

My cabin is set up as a twin, it’s spacious and modern enough with lots of varnished wood to provide a nautical mood, there’s lots of hanging space and hangars, the bathroom is bright and, contrary to some reports I’d read, the shower stall is large enough (though the shower and tap pressure is lacking).

As mine is the most sternward cabin I can hear suitcases being carried to every other cabin but mine. Each extra heavy thump reverberating through the wall gives futile hope that my bag has landed. Guest services say to be patient so I set off to explore the ship. There’s a lot of pressure to buy. Spa treatments, wine packages, excursions, pre-departure cocktails, even soda packages for Coke addicts, are just some of the offerings. I find the coffee station where there’s hot water for tea and I hope the coffee/tea imbalance is redressed before Radiance arrives in Oz later this year.

Tampa is behind us, we’re well off the coast of Florida and the early dinner sitting is well underway and I still don’t have my luggage. Guest services say that I should just be patient but I’m contemplating two weeks in shorts, T-shirt, Crocs and one pair of underpants. Fortunately, a young American already in holiday mode overhears my dilemma. “Did you have booze in your bag? They’ve been really tough on bringing liquor onboard and there are piles of bags down at Security on Deck 2.”

Cartoon light bulb illuminates. I didn’t have alcohol but I did have a ceramic kitchen knife I’d bought in the US to see if it really did “stay sharp 15 times longer”. And I found the bag it was in at security. The knife stays with security for the voyage. I now have one of my two bags but, sadly, it’s only the small bag of shopping and everything else I didn’t need for the cruise. I continued my quest for my main suitcase. And I found it, behind a door right by Guest Services. I was heading to ask a question and passed by a door that automatically opened by sensor to reveal my suitcase stowed inside. Ta Da! I took it.

I changed, went to dinner met my dining companions for the next two weeks and fell into bed as the ship sailed towards Cuba.

I expect there are people who walk on to a ship for the first time with a deck plan etched into their brains. Not me – I read the reviews and get a feeling for the ship but I love the joy of discovering things for myself. It’s even better if the journey of discovery finds enough hidden nooks and crannies that it continues for a few days.

That’s certainly been the case here on Radiance. It’s Day 3 and I can get to the breakfast buffet, my dinner table and the pool deck (where the resident band seems determined to infuse the spirit of Bob Marley into inappropriate songs). Beyond that, most of the ship is a mystery to me. But that will all change as I set out with notepad and pen in hand. May I say that this state of ignorance has nothing to do with Royal Caribbean. At each lift foyer there’s a model of the ship with the main features clearly marked. They are listed above the door in each lift, too.

Besides Deck 3, where my cabin lies, Deck 11 is most important. This is where Windjammers Café is found – the source of buffet breakfasts and lunches. And they can be taken outside where tables in the stern are well protected from the warm wind. Forward lies the densely foliated jungle of the Solarium and its pool, which is populated by the same passengers every day perhaps, like Livingstone, awaiting rescue by their own Stanley. The spa further forward offers a wide range of mysterious treatments behind doors that are decorated in an Aztec theme.

Above this deck there’s a nightclub that offers great ocean views by day, the sports area featuring a climbing wall up the funnel, the gym, the Adventure Ocean kid’s area, Crown and Anchor bar, golf course and jogging track.

For the next few decks down, the public areas are around the Centrum. So on Deck 10 there’s a small, quiet lounge area and the Concierge Club for Royal Caribbean’s best passengers. Here, you are likely to find out about the joys of taking 100 – or even 200 – voyages as several of them have. Deck 9 has the small library and Deck 7 has the Internet area. All of these are open areas offering views over the Centrum with its impressive, if indecipherable, hanging sculpture.

By Deck 6 the public areas extend from bow to stern. The Aurora Theatre, where the entertainment is surprising good – from funny comedians to exceptional musicians – fills the bow on Decks 5 and 6; Cascades Restaurant fills the stern on Decks 4 and 5. The rest of Deck 6 holds the Casino and the specialty restaurants Portofino for Italian and Chops for steaks. It also has the quirky Schooners Bar (now there’s a name that will be popular in NSW) that you enter through a galleon-styled corridor decorated with old cannons and gunpowder kegs. Rather alarmingly, it always smells slightly of gunpowder (or perhaps it’s because I watched Pirates of the Caribbean on our first night at sea). The middle of Deck 5 is occupied with a range of shops where everything appears to be constantly on sale. There are even Pringles and the like available in case the 11 meals offered each day aren’t sufficient.

Of course, for readers who, like me, don’t hold ship details in their memories, the past four paragraphs are really just white space. However, you’ll probably know more than at least one of my fellow passengers. I was in the elevator today, heading for an upstairs bar. A middle-aged man got in the lift and asked me “what’s the top floor of this ship?” We both looked at the buttons where the numbers were logically set out from Decks 2 to 13 and I said, “It’s Deck 13, would you like me to press it for you?” He thanked me and added, “I’m normally with my wife and she takes care of those things.” Whether that was the onerous task of pushing buttons or ensuring that he didn’t reach the outer deck of Deck 13 and continue, absentmindedly, to climb to the heavens in a quest for Deck 14 he never elaborated.

This may seem strange coming from a cosseted cruise writer but I consider myself to be quite an adventurous traveller. I’ve hitched across Tibet, swum with whale sharks and even visited the scary, mean streets of New York before Mayor Guliani cleaned them up. But 14 years ago, on a three-year motorcycle ride around the world, I skipped Columbia. That was largely because Colombian prisoners had taken over their entire prison and the rest of the country was in control of drug cartels so the Colombian Tourist Authority took the unusual step of asking international visitors not to come. Tales abounded of backpackers on the streets clad only in cardboard boxes after all else was stolen.

Not visiting Colombia in general and Cartagena in particular is one of the regrets of my travel life. I’ve seen Romancing the Stone and remembered the dramatically beautiful scenes around the port of Cartagena.The first port of call on this Radiance of the Seas voyage is Cartagena, so one travel regret is about to be redressed.

But with an inordinate fondness for my cameras, my passport and my life I approach the day with some trepidation. However, a man I spoke to in one of the ship’s bars tells me that he’d been to Cartagena before and found it perfectly safe: “the Mexicans run the drugs into the US now and the Colombian government keep the old town of Cartagena under solid security so it’s very safe for tourists. However, if you wander into the other areas

Cartagena is an astonishing monument to mistrust. It’s World Heritage because it was a heavily-fortified city surrounded by forts and bastions. And it was eventually so impregnable that, despite numerous attempts, it wasn’t captured and destroyed and remains an excellent historical sight.

But that isn’t my first impression of the city. As we sail past a small entrance fort, the horizon is filled with gleaming white skyscrapers that mark the modern city. Oops, I thought it was merely a quaint old place where the only industry was flogging T-shirts and coffee. However, after more than an hour’s delay in disembarkation because Island Princess grabbed our dock, I directed the cab to take me to the entrance to the old city. Here there are hours of enjoyment in walking the streets of beautiful colonial terraces houses, clambering onto the battlements and watching kids playing in the central plaza. Most remarkable is the way that nice-but-nondescript doorways open to reveal beautiful verdant courtyards where fountains tinkle and flowers bloom.

Then it’s time to head into the Museum of Torture right on the main square. It begins with a list of leading questions from the XVII Century that modern politicians would find enlightening. “Why did you become a witch? What is the name of your master amongst the evil spirits? What demons and people attended your wedding?” Who could answer those questions without feeling the rack or stocks looming?

Of course, there’s an array of instruments of torture. The ingenuity to inflict pain on others is remarkable but, after seeing objects that I hope were never used, I come back into the sunshine feeling rather unclean. My purification takes place in a restaurant with wi-fi called Waffles & Crepes where I seek salvation and it’s largely delivered. The coffee is excellent, too.

After a day of walking I feel I have a good grasp on this very appealing city. Contrary to preconceptions I remain unmugged and no-one has offered me cocaine. Only one question remains. Where was the dock scene with Danny DeVito filmed? I walk into an emerald dealer cleverly named “Romance in the Stone” and ask. The answer is shattering: the film was set in Cartagena but was filmed in Mexico’s Veracruz. No wonder my walk along the top of the city walls didn’t trigger any memories.

As I caught a cab back to the ship ($20 each way) it started to rain. But not in a wimpy temperate climate sort of way – this was the deluge you’d get if you hang washing on your hotel room’s ceiling sprinkler. I have an umbrella but that just means I’m drenched from the waist down. Fortunately, a hot shower and dry clothes are just a security scan and ID check away. As we sail away the sun breaks through and the modern high rise skyline is bathed in a golden sunset. I vow to return.

For most of us, Colon is just a jumping off point to the nearby feature synonymous with the whole country of Panama – the Panama Canal. There are some human achievements that show that grand plans can come to fruition and we should be proud of what we can achieve. In an age when laying national broadband cables seems all too difficult, it’s hard to imagine looking at 77 kilometres of mountains and disease-ridden jungle and picking up pick and shovel and thinking “we can dig a ditch through this and link two oceans”. It’s even more surprising that it was first proposed in 1534 by the king of Spain.

However, things only really got underway when the French, filled with enthusiasm after digging the Suez Canal that was twice as long in just 10 years, started on the Panama Canal in 1880. Apart from running out of money, they only made two fundamental mistakes. Firstly, they wanted an all-water route. That is, they weren’t planning to have locks but simply to dig a trench deep enough for ships to sail through. Secondly, they underestimated the environment so rain caused excavations to collapse and thousands of workers died of disease from the swamps. It’s estimated that 30,000 of the 80,000 people that worked on the canal perished – and most (perhaps 22,000) died during the French attempt.

In 1903, the US took a lease over the site and set to work in 1904 with the enthusiastic support of President Theodore Roosevelt. A lot more was known about the causes of disease by then so the swamps were drained and mozzies poisoned. Ingenious techniques to move the rock and dirt were devised and a more-conservative lock-based crossing was designed. The canal was finished two years ahead of schedule and the first ship sailed through the canal’s three sets of locks on August 15, 1914.

Trivia question: in what direction does the Panama Canal run? The logical answer is west to east from the Pacific to the Atlantic but that’d be wrong. In fact the canal runs north to south, with the Pacific on the southern side. Colon is on the Caribbean or northern side.

In 1997 I rode my motorcycle the length of the canal from Panama City to Colon and back. At that time the canal was still in US hands – it was handed to Panama at midnight on December 31, 1999. As Radiance of the Seas would be transiting the canal tomorrow I decide to take an organized excursion to see the canal from a kayak around the islands of Gatun Lakes.

Minutes after we leave the small city of Colon behind, the bus stops so we can observe about a dozen howler monkeys in a tree. They are probably both the noisiest and laziest of monkeys so we soon move on. We then spend about an hour watching two cruise ships pass through Gatun Locks, a fascinating engineering insight. Finally we arrive at a lakeside resort and take a 30-minute boat trip along the canal, passing close by two cruise ships on the way. The kayaks are sit on, rather than sit in and we only see a few rather nondescript birds for the hour or so we are on the water but we do see a sloth (three-toed) and a crocodile as we disembark the transfer boat. The locks are more impressive than the paddle and the boat journey is an unexpected highlight.

Back on the ship there’s an increasing mood of anticipation as the captain announces we will be approaching the first lock at 6am tomorrow. Like many, I set my alarm and go to bed early.

For cruise traditionalists the three “must do” voyages are an Atlantic crossing and the two great canals – the Suez and Panama. I’m determined to savour every minute of the Panama Canal. But there’s a timelessness in an inside cabin so my alarm bleats in the dark. I turn on the TV and the bow cam shows we are approaching the entrance of the Panama Canal and it’s bright daylight outside. That certainly galvanizes me into action and a few minutes later I’m dressed and on the bow with a few hundred others. Looking up I see similar crowds on the open spaces facing forward on the upper decks.

A passage through the Panama Canal comes with an unexpected bonus. Our local pilot has good English and a love of the microphone. So we learn lots about the canal throughout the day.

The first, Gatun Locks are the most spectacular. It’s a set of three linked together that raises our 90,000 tons 26 metres in remarkably little time. I see why the captain was saying that our ship really pushes the Panamax dimensions for girth. It’s like trying to put a champagne cork back in the bottle but we’re reassured that the ship has been through before. Soon we are travelling through the manmade Gatun Lakes area I saw yesterday so I take to a deck chair for a nap.

After lunch we pass through the Gaillard Cut, the tough part of construction, where the canal slices through 12.6 km of the mountainous Continental Divide. It’s very impressive to see the work being undertaken to widen the canal for the new, larger locks due to open in 2014. At the end of the cut is the Centennial Bridge looming overhead looking much like Sydney’s Anzac Bridge.

It’s well after lunch when we reach the single-stage Pedro Miguel lock and drop down 9.5 metres towards the Pacific. This lock will become redundant when the two sets of new locks are finished. From here it’s not far to Miraflores Locks and we soon emerge into the Pacific Ocean. We sail past huge docks with giant cranes and pass under the old Bridge of the Americas that links North and South America. The very impressive skyline of Panama City forms a suitable backdrop.

The Panama Canal is a remarkable structure of great interest to anyone interested in engineering. But its ramifications are grand, too. If this were a voyage from New York to San Francisco we would sail 9,500 km, a considerable reduction on the 22,500 km voyage around Cape Horn between these two ports. No wonder many ships have been built to fit this canal – the so-called Panamax dimensions.

The new Panama locks will be at least 25 per cent larger in length and draft and 51 per cent in beam. Already ships are being designed for the New Panamax standard. Later, the captain confides that Radiance of the Seas has jumped the gun. A construction error resulted in the ship being 106.5 feet wide when the maximum permissible beam is 106 feet. When Radiance first passed through the canal in 2001, the President came down to watch its passage. In Pedro Miguel lock the ship scrapes both sides. And there’s a fine levied by the Panama Canal Authority for being the wrong proportions.

Our loquacious pilot told us how much Royal Caribbean International paid for Radiance passing through the canal. The toll was $300,120. And this is no “Oh, I haven’t got my credit card with me, I’ll pay you later” the payment must be wired through at least 48 hours before transit. No wonder we are seeing a lot of rounding-the-Horn cruises these days.

It’s after 4pm when we are back at sea. Most of us are exhausted and can only imagine how tired the captain and officers on the bridge must be. I make a cup of tea and settle into the Pacific part of the voyage.